So soon I will have been blogging for 3 years - I started a few weeks before my surgery. So I am close to my 3 year anniversary with the band too. It's sobering and important to look back sometimes and see really how much has changed and stayed the same.
Of course losing over 100 pounds changed my life - I am in remission from diabetes and a generally healthier person. Yes, I look better. Yes, I am treated better (by some people). My day to day life has changed because it is simply easier to physically do things now and I don't worry about always being judged for my looks.
Many things haven't changed though - I live in the same place, I have the same job (sadly), I have the same amazing husband and daughter.
Losing weight did not change the core person I was - I was a good,honest person at 300 pounds the same as I am at 176 pounds. I can't and won't hate that person. I can be disappointed that I let myself gain that weight, but I will not call myself names or belittle the person I was then. That body gave birth to a wonderful daughter and married a wonderful man and helped me have fun for many years. If I look back and call myself names or belittle who I was how am I any better than the kid in grade school that called me "Linda Lardo"? No, I'm not.
Please remember to be gentle on yourself sometimes and respect the person you were and the person you are becoming. I get sad when I read posts when people are constantly belittling themselves for being fat, when they wouldn't say the same to others.
We all need to love ourselves a little more - fat, skinny or in between.
12 comments:
This is a great post. Thank you for sharing. I never thought less of myself...even at my highest weight. I always thought I was amazing. But I get so frustrated when I read blogs and people are calling themselves fat or former fatty. That is not fair. It makes me wonder if you didn't love yourself at your highest weight...how can you possible love yourself now.
Very true...I was almost 280 pounds when I gave birth to my daughter, 240 lbs when I married my husband. Yes, my life wan't perfect, but I don't hate the person I was.
I look at myself and see the same me, just differently. I am still the same loving, kind person I am now. The one awesome thing my extra weight brought me was some wonderful friendships...thank you!
First of all, let me say this: I'm STILL a "fatty", and I love me now as much as I did when I weighed 351 lbs!
When I was bigger, I didn't do as much physically as I do now, but I still thought I was the shit...that will never change!
I am GRATEFUL for my fat. If I hadn't grown up fat, I would probably have been insufferable! I think growing up fat taught me invaluable life lessons. It taught me how to be funny, and how to be a survivor rather than a victim. I will ALWAYS like who I am...fat, fatter or fattest!
And Linda? I like you! I think you are also the shit! And if you ever weigh close to 300lbs again, I'll still think you're awesome!!
You have done so well and should be celebrated. I too have never from a lack of self love much like all my friends who commented before me. I just feel better at a lower weight.
Ahhh ... now these are the words of some one who has walked the walk ... Losing weight is most definately good for us , life changing even ... BUT .. it does not solve lifes problems .. we are all still the same people inside with the same non weight related issues ... Nubies.. please note .....
Good to hear from you :-)
Great post...very true. I love you now and I loved you back then.
Linda I love this post so much. We as fat people have belittled ourselves for so long we need to hear this.
You can do some much more by building up rather than tearing down.
Hugs!!
Great post! I think some people definitely get so obsessed with their weight that they think if they could only fix that one thing, then everything would be peachy. Then when they lose that weight, they find that it was unrealistic to believe that was the only problem they had. It's just a body. Yes, it's better to be healthier so you can stick around longer with the ones you love but in the end, it's just a shell.
This is so spot-on that it's scary!
I sometimes jokingly call myself a former fatty... but you're RIGHT, I wouldn't say that to any of my blogger friends (or ANYONE, really)... so why would I do that to me?
I think we all need to ban that word from our dictionaries.
Congrats on almost 3 years. You're a rockstar, Linda. :)
Hi there! I don't think I was following you before today. Not sure how I missed ya! Thanks for your comment about the Towson Towne Center. I will definitely be careful. When we are in town this Christmas we should get together!
I'm with you on this. If we lose sight of what it was like for us at our heaviest weight then we might also lose our ability to relate to people who still are in that situation. And what sense would that make? No matter what we weigh we are still worthy of respect. Everyone has their faults it's just that overeating is obvious to the world. It is hard to hide. But no one is perfect. You said it better than anyone could have!
Lind what you write is so true.. we can change many things in our life, and many things in our life change on us.. but we need to remember that you need to love yourself first to be happy.. great post.. hugs
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